Earlier this year, I read a post where the writer stated that whenever you are asked to work on a client project, launch a new business venture, date someone new or bake a pie for the holidays – if your immediate response is not a Hell Yea! then your answer is no.
It’s that simple.
He lived by this principle. The writer explained that he had learned when you say “yes” to something that doesn’t create an immediate positive response, you will not be at your best. He continued by mentioning that saying yes to things that are counter-intuitive will force you to make a more difficult decision in the future.
For the past week, while running, I have thought about his advice while dissecting my decisions. With the glow of holiday lights illuminating the streets, my thoughts created images like a yearly recap played on New Year’s Eve.
While looping our block, my brain searched for answers. Why did I say “yes” when I knew the answer was “no.” Why?
Mixed between inflatable snowmen and decorated rooftops, I thought about Dr. Henry Cloud, and his discussion about the cringe factor in his book 9 Simply Must Do. He shares a story about how a client refused to enter into any relationship if there was a cringe factor involved.
When there is a cringe factor, there will never be a Hell Yea!
Last night my focus was on the cringe factor. I thought about a couple of decisions that I knew, as I know now, should have been a “no” instead of “yes” because these decisions involved accepting a cringe factor.
Often we slip down the slippery “yes” slop without thinking, only to regret our decision later. On the top of a page in my journal, I have written: Hell Yea! No, and Cringe Factor. Every major decision I’ve made this year was written under a heading. Afterward, I tally the count of each column. I didn’t have as many Hell Yea’s! as I would have liked.
Awareness is a gift and blessing.
We can only change when we have uncovered the why at the root of our decisions.
Take time for yourself this week to review your decisions. Which column has the most? Why? Do you know the basis for your decisions? For answers to the cringe factor – do you know how you got there?
As 2018 appears on the horizon, I think about how I will spend my time and energy. I want to make sure my answers and decisions are not counter-intuitive.
The writer’s Hell Yea! principal is grounded on Gothe’s quote, “what is most important should never be at the mercy of what matters the least.”
Remember our immediate response to questions or demands from others is golden. It’s our authentic decision, how we manage and proceed from our innate response is up to us.