Poetry

Twice in 2016, I thought to myself, “Am I going backward? Was I regressing to a place I no longer wanted to be?”

Both times, I was an event participant.  Everything felt dated.  After several attendees voiced concern, the coordinator stated, “That’s the way it’s always been done, no need to change.”  Staring back at the individual, I felt like an alien.

I don’t want to go backward, especially after I’ve spent so much mental energy moving forward.  The last thing I wanted to do was to get stuck in another rut.

In all of my experiences, there has never been a time where going backward proved beneficial.

Not once.

As an impatient movie viewer, films are consumed while working on the computer with the audio playing in the background or during dinner. Last night’s working selection was Whiskey Tango Foxtrot starring Tina Fey as Kim Barker.  The movie is based on Barker’s book.

I’ve been thinking about Tina Fey’s character and the reason she became a war correspondent.  Each day she faithfully ran on a treadmill. One day, she noticed the constant motion was moving the machine backward across the carpet.  In her mind, she was regressing in life instead of gaining.

Again, I am consumed with the question “Am I moving forward or not gaining at all?”

Change surrounds us, yet for many, there is no movement, there is no internal growth, there is only redundancy.  The creation of goals reworked year after year.  There is comfort in knowing what to expect each and every minute of every day.  Being too comfortable can evolve into compliancy distorting reality masquerading as happiness.

2016 was a mixed bag as I was surprised and pleased with the growth of my business while conversely dealing with several sobering realizations.  From the new awareness, I gained wisdom enabling me to move forward once again.  I am not the same person I was six months.  My approach to problems and how I formulate decisions is different.   My worldview is constantly evolving.

When you think you are moving backward, stop and ask yourself why you feel this way and what could be the triggers? Often we ignore our inner voice.  Look beyond the usual answers and responses, what else is under the surface.  Is there a decision or something you are avoiding that needs to be addressed?

If nothing comes to mind, then think of the most outside of the box answer.  Anything? If not, let your mind noodle on why for while.  When you least expect an answer it will appear.

I believe the only way we can move forward and create a meaningful life is to avoid events and people who cause us to move backward.   Our world is full of too many amazing things to be satisfied with how it’s always been done or remaining stuck in a rut refusing to evolve.

 

What Matters Most Must Never Be At the Mercy of What Matters Least.
Goethe

As an avid runner, I’m run six days a week in my neighborhood. Today’s run was a treat, a beautiful fall morning, cool and crisp with a slight dampness from the dew. My pace was faster as my body adapted to the chilly temperature. Fall is my favorite time of the year to run.

My mind is most creative during my runs and I am always thinking about something.  My mind settles into a quiet meditation on the longer runs as I have sorted through my thoughts by the third mile.

This morning, I was thinking about Work Simply by Carson Tate, a book I picked up at the library two weeks ago.  At first, I read through a couple of pages and put the book down.

I thought, “just another how to be productive” book.  I always give books a second chance, and while waiting for my son at band practice, I opened the book again and started reading. I realized Tate’s book was different.

In the book, she talks about how we’ve been trained to use planners and the amount of time we can waste managing our to-do lists. Her words started working their way through my mind as I thought about what she was saying.

During the run, I kept thinking about how much time we waste inputting data in our planners, especially scheduling every tiny detail of our life down to five minutes to meditate, five minutes to walk around our cube, five minutes to plan a strategy for clients.

Back when we were transitioning from the farm to the factory, managers were taught that workers could not be allowed to think for themselves.  We, the workers, must be told what to do every minute of the work day. This mentality has lead to our modern day busyness, must stay busy, must stay busy…

We are obsessed with busywork in American.

It is our badge of honor, the Holy Grail of cubeville or Starbuck’s.  We write in our emails and text messages – “I’m slammed!, My bandwidth is tapped!, and I’m swamped!” We work diligently to complete our planner checklist.  We compare notes on how many emails are in our inbox as if it is a ranking in our importance. More emails = higher pay?

Our ego and self-worth are wrapped up in our busyness. Being busy is not the same as being productive. There is a difference.  I think about the productive individuals who lived hundreds of years ago.  They did not have any cool tech tools to help them and they produced an enormous amount of work.

Dozens of thoughts filled my mind as I connected the dots and I thought “what if, we didn’t assign time to projects? Before you freak out, I know what you’re thinking, “How could we bill clients? and “How would we know if we’re profitable or not?”

What I am suggesting is that we work on the projects instead of spending so much time writing down every detail into our planners. What if we spent time focusing on the project and what needs to be done? No fancy rules just focus our time on what is important.

Since reading Tate’s book, I’ve stopped scheduling ridge time slots for client work; I am referring to work completed outside the client’s office. I am more relaxed and can focus on what I need complete instead of feeling guilty for ignoring my planner.

We’ve been brainwashed to believe the only way we can be productive is to create highly detailed strict; factory styled schedule to dictate our day.

We think there is no other way to work.  I question every part of how I plan my day.  I have two whiteboards in the office. One board, I write my weekly schedule. The second whiteboard is where I list critical action items such as add Google Analytics to the new website, schedule my car for service, and so forth.  You get the idea.

I have greater confidence in my ability to get work done.  This past week, I have started writing in the mornings immediately following my runs.  I know without a doubt this is the most creative time of the day. I have written more in three days in less time.

 Our brains are not binary, we need time to think.  We cannot turn our thinking on and off like a light bulb.

I believe our planners are obsolete as we are not factory workers anymore.  Our world and how we work is undergoing a significant transformation.  We’re knowledge workers and innovation and growth are not derived from breaking our day into tiny slots of time. Innovation comes from our creativity and having time think and solve difficult problems.

To-do lists have a place when organizing specific tasks and projects, these lists are not meant to be carried with us each day, depleting our mental energy along the way.

Nor will our productivity increase by using more planners, more scheduling apps, or creating more busy work, these are all leftovers from the Industrial Revolution Era.

I’ll leave you with a thought – a person can be organized without writing and scheduling every detail into a planner.

Memory Number 10689, Log Date March 19, 2025.  City 3458, Section 9 Northern Village

I sit quietly in my grandmother’s chair gazing out the large picture window in my house.  My eyes follow the blue jays as they quickly gather small twigs for their nest.

For a moment, I let my mind float back to when my mother was alive.  We would spend the entire day outside walking in the woods and listening to the birds.

I always felt alive in the springtime, a welcomed relief after a long, cold winter.

My wrist chip pings.  Within seconds, a hologram reminder appears – 14:00 meeting to discuss management of Watson Gen IV system. Sitting motionless, I watch the birds complete their task.  A sensor detects no moment and pings my wrist again, prepare for scheduled meeting in 3 minutes, 42 seconds.

Standing, I walk across the room and pick up my virtual reality helmet (VRs) and engagement gloves.  I have no motivation to work today yet it must be done.  My mind continues to wonder as I think about my niece and nephew.

They use VRs to experience nature instead of going outside, part of me is jealous of the VR programs they use.  The VR software is integrated into everything eliminating the separation between reality and VR.  We create our worlds and can alter our reality within the set rules during free time.

Altering memories and changing past events is popular with the kids and teens, most of the adults not have such time for such luxuries or care anymore about the past.

I use to spend time creating unique VR programs for competition to earn extra free time or a pass for rides outside the city.   Three years ago when I had to help support my brother’s family, I lost interest in the competition.

Amethyst, my niece, loves to listen to birds especially the extinct species.  About ten years ago, a non-profit organization hired scientists and software integrators to instruct a system to develop a program  enabling students to listen to extinct animal sounds.

The program is so popular, the non-profit sells a consumer version titled Feathers.  Amethyst uses the program to create new bird species for her VR system.  My favorite species are the large purple birds with orange beaks that only sing in the evenings.

+++This is draft of a science fiction manuscript and is covered by the Terms and Services and Copyright.

 

I started working on this blog post almost two years ago after I had purchased a banned book.  Being able to select any book and read it is part of our democratic freedom.

Until today, the blog was parked in my “Pending” folder. I would review the post, edit, and the click saved.  Writing is a process.  I almost posted the blog when I read Rachel Gillett’s article in Business Insider about Elon Musk’s ex-wife, Justin Musk.

The article focused on the lessons Justin Musk had learned from her former husband.  Her insight was brilliant and the article went viral on social media.

Justin Musk responded to a Quora thread about finding your passion which sparked the article by Gillett.  Musk stated, “It’s not what gives you bliss or makes you happy 24/7, but what you’re willing to suffer for – what you genuinely believe to be worth the sacrifice.”

The passions and dreams that reside in our soul require work and dedication.  Justine Musk talked about her emotional resonance and how it applied to her writings and life.  Her main point is that we often overlook what is at the roots of our passion.  What makes us tick and drives us to pursue our dreams.

Books provide an emotional resonance to me.  Being dyslexic I had a difficult time reading in school and still scan across many words I am unable to decipher.  Below is the original post.

Reading a Banned Book (2014)

For some, I walked on the edge today when I purchased a banned book.  I found the book at an estate sale for .50 cents and could not resist.  The lady of the house was not from Dallas as her book selection reflected a cosmopolitan traveler whom I suspect previously lived in New York City or Europe.

The banned book was The Art of Racing in the Rain by Garth Stein.  At home, I went through my collection of purchased books and started reading a couple of sentences from each book.  After the first two pages of Stein’s book, I was hooked and could not put it down.

A dog tells the story.  He dreams of becoming a man. I read the book within 48 hours and am completely dumbfounded why this book was banned.  I searched through the pages seeking an answer.  Anyone who spends time on the Internet sees the trash talk posted on social media networks which I believe is often far worse than what is written in this book.

The dog had compassion.  He took a stand for truthfulness and decency; he was a man of honor.

In high school, I read Catcher in the Rye, Huckleberry Finn, Animal Farm, A Separate Piece, and other literary classics that were often banned or considered controversial.

My mother taught high school AP English for 30 years and assigned many of these famous books. She always gave her students an option if they requested to read a different book.  I can remember when the first Harry Potter was published and how it was banned by schools and organizations.

Dr. Scott Peck wrote about how life is hard in his timeless book – The Road Less Traveled.  Learning how to deal with the hard knocks and messy aspects of life is not easy.   There is a time and place for everything.  Instead of banning books it is our responsibility as parents to discuss with our children why we believe a specific book or movie should not be read or viewed.

When I was teenager my mother explained her reasoning why I could not see R-rated movies.  I did not always agree with my mother; however, I always respected her judgment. Now, I am a parent and can fully understand and appreciate her wisdom.   A teacher at heart she focused on educating me about difficult situations and subject matters.  She offered guidance as I learned to make my own decisions.

As a teacher, my mother was against book banning.  She believed it was important to educate her students and focused on teaching them how to make good decisions.  She discussed writers who offered her students an opportunity to study from afar the hardships of life, and then discuss solutions for handling these difficult situations.

As authors, it is our responsibility to make sure what we write and create is to the best of our ability and most importantly encourages our readers to think.  There are about two dozen books that have stayed with me through the years.  Reading these books forever changed my thinking, awareness, and perspective.

Conclusion

I know why I write and why it is important to me.  Just like Justin Musk discussed how we are willing to suffer and sacrifice for our passions.  We must be willing to stand up and make a difference for what we genuinely believe is worth our efforts.  Writing books is what is important to me for many reasons, and I make the effort to manage my dyslexia so I can write.

I think about the book, the emotions I felt while reading, and most importantly, I think about how I wished the dog in The Art of Racing in the Rain was a real person.